About 12 years ago…
I'm in an ashram in the woods of a small island in Canada and toninght I will be sleeping on a wooden platform surrounded by a field of rustling ferns.
I hear a few last drops of rain tap on the tarp above me, the echoes of the kirtan still humming inside me. I only have my guitar with me, a small bag with some clothes and a sheepskin.
I lie down on the soft wool and let the sounds of the forest come to life in my lot.
The darkness beneath the canopy of old trees feels reassuring.
I feel the caress of the cool evening breeze on my skin, tenderly.
Her freedom is enchantingly soft and makes me fluid.
She makes the ecstasy that lives inside my skin palpable, and soon the rest follows…
I flow out over the entire manifestation and, there is no choice, let myself be carried away outside of time.
I know: here in the nothingness, here, everything is present.
Here lies the fulfillment of the deepest longing that lay behind everything I ever thought I longed for. Here all longings dissolve. Here, in this simplicity, 'I' dissolve.
There is no doubt: true fulfillment is available to us in every moment.
Her simplicity can feel unfamiliar. Nothing is needed, you don't have to change anything about yourself. No substance, no technique, no sacrifice. It is here, just like that.
Deep fulfillment waits patiently for us to let go of grasping at what we think we desire.
The grasping, the striving, the longing, it is a habit that we can let go of.
We can also uncover it, layer after layer, by compassionately feeling all the desires that touch us in their fullness. Deeper and deeper we descend in the landscape of our longings, until we reach the deepest desire that underlies all our desires. This desire, this holy longing, will guide you the way and fuel your journey.
We find her, She finds us, in the deep penetration of this moment.
Deep fulfillment awaits you too, but it can feel scary, I know.
In the practice of devotional non-dual yoga we get to know the experience of deep unconditional fulfillment, it becomes familiar to us, we learn to trust it.
In this way we will be able to allow ourselves more and more to surrender to what is, here.
We discover that when we hold on to nothing, Everything is ours.
Ganga Ma, December 9, 2024
